Elvis Is Alive And Working At McDonald’s In Waikiki-- And Singing At Night!
by Kalani Harrington - posted on Sat Aug 14 2004
That’s what I heard from some friends in Chinatown. They insisted that Elvis, the King, was working at McDonald’s in Waikiki. You’ve heard the rumors of the King working at Burger King, right? The Burger King on Kalakaua Avenue in Waikiki closed down so maybe he just moved over to McDonald’s.
There’s no better kind of investigative journalism than a journalist who investigates. It must be in my blood. So I headed to the McDonald’s on Kalakaua Avenue in Waikiki in search of Elvis. Amazingly, Elvis is what I found.
But not what I expected.
I ordered a Quarter Pounder with Cheese, a Coke, and large sized my French fries (which could be a painful experience if not for what I learned while teaching English in a small Asian country). When the girl behind the counter brought my order, I asked, “Hey, is Elvis working today?”
Without batting an eye (or displaying even a glimmer of knowledge of modern American history), she replied, “Who’s Elvis?”
I said, “You know. Elvis Presley. The King. Rock ‘n Roll. Blue Hawaii.” Well, that triggered something in the nubile young lady and immediately extended her English ability beyond, “Would you like fries with that?”
She said, “Oh, Blue Hawaii. Rock ‘n Roll. The King. Elvis.” The reverse order of what I’d just stated sorta scared me. I was afraid we’d be stuck in this Twilight Zone space time continuum loop, or something.”
“Yes, Elvis plays at the Blue Hawaii Show.”
I was dumbfounded. Amazingly, after millions of fans searched the entire earth for tidbits of information regarding Elvis’ whereabouts, here he was—singing in Waikiki (and working at McDonald’s, I guess—but I never actually saw him there).
“Blue Hawaii Show?”, I stammered.
She said, “Yes, Elvis sings at the Blue Hawaii Show in the Waikiki Beachcomber Hotel on Kalakaua Avenue. It’s the 23-hundred block, I think.”
Thank you. Thank you very much, ma am.
Lickety split, I’m off toward the Waikiki Beachcomber Hotel to get a glimpse of Elvis before anyone else knows—although I admit to being somewhat puzzled why a young lady behind the counter at McDonald’s seemed to know so much about Elvis.
Once inside the hotel I came face to face with --- A poster of Elvis. Hot dog. I’m on the right track. Except that this Elvis didn’t look exactly like Elvis. I mean, he was close. But not quite there.
Being the thorough investigative journalistic gringo that I am, I decided to read the fine print.
“Blue Hawaii – The Show. The world’s greatest Elvis impressionist recreates romantic old Hawaii.”
Uh oh.
“Named one of the world’s greatest Elvis impressionist by national media, Jonathan Von Brana recreates romantic old Hawaii…”
Uh oh.
It was an Elvis impersonator. Not the real Elvis. I’d been duped.
Now I had to walk all the way back to McDonald’s.
Posted by Kalani Harrington on 08/14 at 12:46 AM
Category: Activities • 1 Comments • Permalink • Email It
Ich würde sagen DUMM GELAUFEN
03.08.2005, 11:09
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